Series: The Story So Far

Where to Find This Fantastical Comedy Party

Buy the most fantastically amazing, stupendous, not-exaggerating-at-all science-fiction novella series to ever misuse the English language. It's a blast of comedy that shoots milk out your nose!

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Issue 1: Serial Fiction Sideshow

Nothing is more dangerous than a halfwit who controls all crime!

In the galaxy of Stratus Cloud, commerce and advertising rule every aspect of life—up to and including Intergalactic Protection, the galaxy's foremost source of military might and occasional law enforcement. Military uniforms and weaponry all bow to the whims of corporate sponsors. For five days only! Fifty percent off space cruisers! Buy two and get a free blaster for the kiddies!

But beneath this money-grubbing surface lurks another faction equally obsessed with profit. Only infighting prevents these underworld criminal organizations from controlling the galaxy. It's a delicate balance with which no one is crazy enough to mess.

No one, that is, except for Master Asinine, whose name sums up his personality. He's decided Stratus Cloud needs to remember his golden rule: whoever has the planet-destroying laser wins. And, as luck would have it, Asinine just happens to have a planet-destroying laser. Go figure.

Standing against Asinine is his one-time friend, Matross Legion, a green-skinned Trioxidillian. Together with a small group of hyperpeople—people with unusual abilities—Legion will take the battle to Asinine or die trying. Which is fine by Asinine. He's looking for a fight.

Check out the original ending to chapter 4!

Rated PG
Comedic violence, mischief, made-up swears, random name-calling, total hilarity
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Issue 2: Home Sweet Home Invasion

So asking where to find the restroom is out of the question?

When Power Plant and Franchise's starship crash-lands on the Bad Guys' new home turf, a simple mission goes from routine observe-and-report duty to straight-up survival. And their pilot, a robot with a vocal processor built from car alarms, doesn't make hiding any easier whenever it decides to speak its mind at 120 decibels.

Can Power Plant and Franchise outwit Master Asinine's hunting party long enough for Legion and Burnout to mount a rescue operation? Or will the hunting party execute them before Power Plant runs out of stuff to break? Did Power Plant even brush his teeth before he left the house?

It's a race between life and death...with a robot who has no inside voice!

Okay, I seem to remember Power Plant brushing his teeth this morning, so that's one problem solved.

Rated PG
Comedic violence, mischief, made-up swears, unglamorized portrayal of suicidal tendencies, random name-calling, crashing the company car, loud robot snowman, total botchery of the arts
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Issue 3: Technophobia

No one told Master Asinine that dicso is dead.

Master Asinine has a new scheme up his pants: take control of the Good Guys' space station by usurping its controlling software, the haunt control. His method of attack? The word-jumbling Scapegoat and the buffet-bingeing Multipurpose.

When Scapegoat and Multipurpose install Asinine's new haunt control control, it wreaks havoc: public-access lyrics to the tune of disco beats. Oh, and attempted murder. Now Good Guys Ace Spandex and Smithereens must find a way to shut it down.

To boot, Schizophrenic escapes Good Guy lockup. All this while Legion needs to impress investors whose money will ensure that the Good Guys continue operation. But how can he when Schizophrenic takes him hostage in his own station?

How will the Good Guys deal with the enemy...when the enemy is their own home?

Rated PG
Comedic violence, mischief, unglamorized portrayal of suicidal tendencies, temptations with alcohol, made-up swears, random name-calling, crashing the company car, forced questioning of your place in this universe
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Issue 4: Armageddon Trigger Finger

What's a guy gotta do to get a break around here?

Legion is invited to speak at the Intergalactic Peace Symposium, a conference based around military response, as a last-minute presenter to showcase the accomplishments of the Good Guys.

Much to Legion's irritation, work follows him wherever he goes when Master Asinine and his typical enclave of idiots make an appearance in the hopes of capturing and cloning the Good Guy leader. For some stupid reason.

But when Legion and Asinine are joined by a mysterious third faction hell-bent on destroying the universe, the two must put aside their differences to stop the shadowy cloaked figures. And just who is this Lord Alpha who sent them anyway?

Absolute hijinks ensue--or at least percolate--in this newest installment of the In a Galaxy Far, Far AwRy series! So get reading! But take a break around lunch.

Rated PG
Comedic violence, mischief, minor alcohol use, made-up swears, random name-calling, crashing the company car, flame-broiling your sense of purpose
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Issue 5: The Genetic Equation

What else should you expect when you give your address to your enemies?

Master Asinine has come up with a new scheme to rid himself of his friend-turned-nemesis, Legion: to combine the Face Blitzkrieg with genetic altering technology and make a dangerous weapon he hopes Schizophrenic won't ridicule him for. Nice try. Schizophrenic's on the ball.

But when Master Asinine and his gang of goons show up on the Good Guys' home turf, Station One, with their new genetic weapons, they threaten to turn their enemies into nothing more than organic soup. Now the Good Guys have to ward off the Bad Guys, keep out of the line of fire, and protect a group of protestors who have shown up to speak against the lack of females in an all-male military.

Can Legion simultaneously fend off the Bad Guys, impress visiting Good Guy overseer Brigadier General Patton, and keep his sanity? It's not even Monday!

Rated PG
Comedic violence, mischief, made-up swears, unglamorized portrayal of suicidal tendencies, random name-calling, dismantling your sense of purpose brick by brick
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Coming Soon...

Issue 6: Power Tool

The greatest power ever is a living person, and he's cranky.

Master Asinine and his alliance of imbeciles, the Bad Guys, have located a source of great power, one they plan to use in their war against the Good Guys. Because Asinine has a one-track mind and he loves his wars. And sausages.

But when that source of great power turns out to be a living person—a reclusive Trioxidillian—things get uglier. Also snarkier.
Sp now the Good Guys must make their move to stop the Bad Guys from acquiring this source of power and being one step closer to total galactic domination. Not easy when Mechanism commences schemes of his own to wrest this power for his own evil deeds.

Meanwhile, left alone at home, Legion falls victim when a mysterious figure from his past sneaks into Station One and captures him for who knows what. Owie.

Can Reef lead his team into the heart of the Bad Guys’ own headquarters to rescue this Trioxidillian from both Master Asinine and Mechanism? Can Legion survive his captor’s murderous plans? Will I shut up and let you read the book? Fine!

Rated PG
Comedic violence, mischief, made-up swears, unglamorized portrayal of suicidal tendencies, alcohol consumption, the babbling of a madman
Coming
Soonish!
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